


Is This Bloomingdales?

by wheremyinhalerat (bearsquares)



Series: Cracked Actors ['06 Losers AU one-shots] [2]
Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: A Fuckword, AU where they get to chill as adults, Adult Losers Club (IT), Alcohol, Banter, Drinking Games, Multi, Slight Memory Loss, just two dudes in a department store i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-17 01:49:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13648926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bearsquares/pseuds/wheremyinhalerat
Summary: idk Eddie's trying to buy a winter jacket and Richie walks up with some sexy lingerie. Discuss.I felt like writing some of that sweet Richie and Eddie banter. It's casual.





	Is This Bloomingdales?

 

 

“What do you think?”

“Huh?”

Richie held up two hangers, one frilly négligée dangling from each. Eddie jumped a little. _Those aren't from the Men’s Department_ , he thought to himself. “Which one, Eds?”

He raised an eyebrow and snorted. “For you?”

“Good god, you’re one hell of a profiler. Catch the Zodiac Killer yet?”

Eddie fiddled with the zipper on a bright pink windbreaker, flipped the tag over, then shook his head. When he left for Los Angeles, Eddie assumed they wouldn’t be flying up to Chicago on a whim. No goddamn way was he subjecting himself to blistering, face-ripping wind in shorts and airy button-ups. They loved visiting Beverly, she just happened to live in some kind of ice hell for a good chunk of the year.

“Something tells me you don’t care.” Richie received a sideways glance in reply. “Well, okay, guess I’m gonna have all the fun picking what Bev’s wearing for Flip cup tomorrow -”

Eddie choked on his own saliva and succumbed to a coughing fit. The last game of Horserace they played completely slipped his mind. After a moment, he stood up, still red in the face. “What’s this about now?”

“She lost the bet last time - loser wears a sexy nightie next time we have boozy game night.”

Eddie squinted, rubbing at his forehead. “Oh god, you’re right.” Color rose in his cheeks. “I keep forgetting about some of the shit we do during visits - such a pain in the ass.”

“Well, I’m glad I remembered this. And you’re glad. We’re all glad, my boy.” Richie held the lingerie up to the harsh ceiling lights, appraising the fabric. “Man, they’re both good. I can see all the way through… _wow_ …”

“Will you cut that out?” Eddie jerked Richie’s arms back down. “How long have you been wandering around with those, anyway?”

“Like, 20 minutes, man. That’s why I need -” He held them out toward Eddie who had to stop himself from flinching away. “Your opinion.”

In spite of his mild embarrassment at being seen with a guy running around with intimates in a fucking Bloomingdale’s, he considered the question - quite seriously. Eddie swallowed and regained his composure. “The blue one. It’s, uh -” _even scantier than the other one._ “It flatters her skin tone. Better. I think.”

Richie was grinning, very fox-like. “The little ruffly fringe at the bottom, yeah?” Eddie chuckled under his breath and they both looked extremely sketchy in that moment. “I trust your judgement.” He neatly placed the other négligée on a display rack. “It’s with the pea coats now.”

“Alright, alright.” Eddie snatched a random jacket from the rack and gave it a cursory look before tucking it under his arm. “Let’s get out of here before people start asking questions.”

“Who’s gonna ask questions?”

Eddie raised both eyebrows. “I’m sorry, I thought you were a bit of a celebrity around here.”

Richie balked. “I might be.”

The conversation ended with a non-committal “hm” from Eddie.

“You know Stan almost lost to Bev? Think this sexy number would fit him?”

“Oh, let’s hope. Oh - Ooooh!“ Eddie stopped, clutching the windbreaker to his chest. “I’m feeling faint. Catch me if I swoon.”

"Legs for miles, my man,” Richie purred, steering him forward.

Eddie turned to swat at him and nearly walked into a mannequin.

 

 

-END. He did it.

**Author's Note:**

> These are just kinda randomly popping out and might have a progression? I dunno. It's a poop.
> 
> \----
> 
> ey <3
> 
> Tumblr: http://bearsquares.tumblr.com/  
> Art Blog: http://chilidogpaella.tumblr.com/


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